Why We Don't Do Santa, The Tooth Fairy, Or Other Imaginary Friends

Why We Don't Do Santa, The Tooth Fairy, Or Other Imaginary Friends

FIRST OF ALL, don't get your panties in a wad. I don't judge any of you for telling your kids there's a Santa Claus. What I'm about to say is what I THINK about it. What you do is up to you. I don't judge your for choosing to do these, so please don't judge me for not doing them.

True story.  When I realized that Santa, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and my Mom had the same handwriting, I questioned my belief in God. No, really. I thought that he was just another imaginary being that my Mom made up to make me behave the way she wanted and control me.

As I got older I regained an understanding of God, but there were a few years there where I thought all these beings that my mom told me to believe in were just made up. There were a few years that I didn't even talk to God.  

When we had our own children, I didn't want to do Santa, or the Easter Bunny, or any of these things, because I thought they might have the same crisis or think I was a liar.  Michael approved.  At times I thought that people who don't believe in Santa are cold, sad beings. The mother from Miracle on 34th Street. The dad from Elf. People like me are the destroyer of childhoods. Allegedly. We lack faith. We lack true happiness. We must have given up on life and now we're dragging down our children with us.

I felt like I was going to suck all the magic out of their little souls. I felt like my children were missing out on something.  Now, I am so sick of defending our decision to NOT do Santa, Halloween, or the Tooth Fairy.  I don't believe Santa has to be part of our Christmas family traditions for my children to smile, be happy, and worship God during the month of December or all year for that matter.  I believe we can have fun, sing Christmas carols, serve others, make yummy food, crafts, gifts and my children will be just fine.  Happy even.

Yes, I have had moments where my kids have asked or wanted to be part of the "Santa Phenomenon" or get a cute costume for Halloween. We discuss our reasons for not participating in that way with these holidays  and let them give feedback on how they feel and if they agree or disagree.  I thought that my children would be SO disappointed in the beginning. I expected sadness.  But, instead my little ones gave me a head nod or a "cool" or an "okay mom"  Once I even got a deeper explanation than I had words for.  Children often surprise me how well or clear they can express themselves. The so called magic of Christmas wasn't gone.  They never have known different because we never had it in our home.  There wasn't some sudden sad realization of unmet expectations.  They were perfectly okay. 

Every year, the day after Thanksgiving we still put up holiday decorations.  Lights, a tree made of ornaments we make and a nativity set. There are meanings to each of the things we put up in our home and some that are just pretty winter decorations. This year I have been thinking about waiting until December 5th setting our our stockings, and on the morning of December 6th, St. Nicholas' Day, we find chocolate coins in them. The legend goes that poor people would hang their stockings by their fireplaces to dry, and St Nick would come by and sneak coins into them through their open windows. A very common tradition is similar, but with shoes left on the hearth. A lot of Christians do it this way so they can keep Christmas strictly about Jesus. I didn't do it this year but there's always next year. 

We don't do all the things that other kids do.  We don't keep them firmly grounded in a world of imagination instead of reality. We want our children to understand things more clearly.  Especially with so much going into them when they are away from us from tvs, radios, and their peers.  Their holidays aren't any less fun, and there's no moment of truth coming up as they grow older. We altered things such as Elf On The Shelf to accommodate fun yet keeping it just that.  No Elf is sent from Santa to spy and watch our children.  Instead we have a little monkey named Meme that is in random locations during the month of December.  It's a fun thing that our family does for fun.  It doesn't take away from the celebration of Jesus birth into this world.  It does give our family experiences together and memories are made. Especially when Meme is hanging by his tail from the ceiling fan.  Laughs and smiles galore!  :)  

Our children have been told not to tell other children there is not a Santa, Tooth Fairy, or Easter Bunny.  We have explained the reason they believe and that's okay for them to.  They don't make fun or think less of others because of it.  I am a little concerned with my 5 year old.  He doesn't keep ANYTHING to himself.  So I am hoping he isn't our trouble maker in school  Pray for us.  He's very thoughts to words.  What he thinks immediately comes out of his mouth.  Much appreciation.  Thanks. 



Blessings, 
Stacey